From the creator of the Furry Basketball Association

The Jackal and the Ostrich: Scene 3

Written by Carrizo

LORNE:
CHERRY:
LORNE: Damndest thing, isn't it?
CHERRY: What?
LORNE: Medicine. In every tip.
CHERRY: What are you talking about?
LORNE: See, no one gets poked more than the porcupine himself. So, scientists say after ages of slipping on ice and landing on our backs, the quills got medicated so they wouldn't infect us.
CHERRY: Why are you telling me this?
LORNE: Because I think they're wrong. It wasn't to protect the porcupine. Infection just kills the tissue. But, see, a quill keeps the nerves alive. Makes the other guy feel every little hook digging deeper and deeper and deeper.
CHERRY: Who are you?
LORNE: Nothing yet. But I am about to be your clearest, most life-changing memory.
CHERRY: You work for Jackal?
LORNE: Little birdies don't ask questions.
SFX: [DRAWER FULL OF STEEL INSTRUMENTS OPENING]
CHERRY: Oh, Christ.
LORNE: They answer them.
CHERRY: Wait. Wait, wait, I don't understand. What am I supposed to tell you? What do you think I know? What do you want?
LORNE: Me? Nothing. Ostrich? Much.
CHERRY: You know who Ostrich is?
LORNE: You don't listen very well.
CHERRY: [SCREAMS IN PAIN]

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