Dialogues

Enoch the Eunuch

Scene 1

Further Confusion | 2016

Daedalus

Rod

Chip

Enoch

Project Premise

Screwball Comedy

In a bizarre legal case, Enoch's minor infraction activated an undiscovered city law that required his castration. And with elections coming up, the incumbent city attorney sticks to his policy of unquestioned obedience to the law. But when a friendly doctor freezes the tissue and assures he can reattach it, Enoch begins a quest to find a loophole forcing the judicial system to give him back what's rightfully his--his balls.

Scene Description

Early in his efforts to get his balls back, Enoch figures that getting a lot of publicity for his unfortunate situation may help convince city voters to overturn the law. When the usual avenues for quick fame fizzle out, he turns to something bigger, getting a spot on a popular game show. But to make sure his name spreads as far as possible, he decides to make sure he's unlike any contestant they've ever had.

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        Welcome to the power round, Enoch! We've got one million dollars to give away tonight. Before we get started, what are your plans if you win?                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        Getting my balls back.                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        You mean like, a baseball collection or something?                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        No. Testicles.                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        This is a family show.                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        How would I know that?                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        All right! We've surveyed one hundred furries, and if you can give us their most popular answers, we'll give you a chance to win one million dollars. Are you ready, Enoch?                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        I sure am, Rod!                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        All right! First question, name a ferocious predator.                                                    

                                                        Crowd                                                    

                                                        [CALLING OUT VARIOUS PREDATORS]                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        Rabbit.                                                    

                                                        Crowd                                                    

                                                        [STUNNED]                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        A rabid what?                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        No, rabbit. Final answer, Rod.                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        [LONG PAUSE] Okay, this one should be easier. Name any kind of canine.                                                    

                                                        Crowd                                                    

                                                        [CALLING OUT VARIOUS CANINES]                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        Hyena.                                                    

                                                        Crowd                                                    

                                                        [STUNNED]                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        I think that got negative votes, Enoch.

Showing 1-1 of 1 dialogue recordings

Enoch the Eunuch