Enoch the Eunuch

Scene 1

Rocky Mountain Fur Con | 2015

Ansaram

Rod

Katsuro

Enoch

Enoch the Eunuch Scene 1

Written by Carrizo

Enoch the Eunuch

Scene 1

Written by Carrizo

Archived at Furrywood.com

Project Premise

Screwball Comedy

In a bizarre legal case, Enoch's minor infraction activated an undiscovered city law that required his castration. And with elections coming up, the incumbent city attorney sticks to his policy of unquestioned obedience to the law. But when a friendly doctor freezes the tissue and assures he can reattach it, Enoch begins a quest to find a loophole forcing the judicial system to give him back what's rightfully his--his balls.

Scene Description

Early in his efforts to get his balls back, Enoch figures that getting a lot of publicity for his unfortunate situation may help convince city voters to overturn the law. When the usual avenues for quick fame fizzle out, he turns to something bigger, getting a spot on a popular game show. But to make sure his name spreads as far as possible, he decides to make sure he's unlike any contestant they've ever had.

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        Welcome to the power round, Enoch! We've got one million dollars to give away tonight. Before we get started, what are your plans if you win?                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        Getting my balls back.                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        You mean like, a baseball collection or something?                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        No. Testicles.                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        This is a family show.                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        How would I know that?                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        All right! We've surveyed one hundred furries, and if you can give us their most popular answers, we'll give you a chance to win one million dollars. Are you ready, Enoch?                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        I sure am, Rod!                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        All right! First question, name a ferocious predator.                                                    

                                                        Crowd                                                    

                                                        [CALLING OUT VARIOUS PREDATORS]                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        Rabbit.                                                    

                                                        Crowd                                                    

                                                        [STUNNED]                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        A rabid what?                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        No, rabbit. Final answer, Rod.                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        [LONG PAUSE] Okay, this one should be easier. Name any kind of canine.                                                    

                                                        Crowd                                                    

                                                        [CALLING OUT VARIOUS CANINES]                                                    

                                                        Enoch                                                    

                                                        Hyena.                                                    

                                                        Crowd                                                    

                                                        [STUNNED]                                                    

                                                        Rod                                                    

                                                        I think that got negative votes, Enoch.

Into the Pipes

Scene 1

Rocky Mountain Fur Con | 2015

Taladrian Kairn

Schultz

K Fox

Craft

Into the Pipes Scene 1

Written by Carrizo

Into the Pipes

Scene 1

Written by Carrizo

Archived at Furrywood.com

Artwork by JHarper

Project Premise

Drama

At one time this was a dog's city, but the rats organized themselves in the sewers, biding their time, slowly chipping away at the power structures above. Now the rats have taken over, running everything above and below ground, forcing the dogs into a leashed subclass with no hope to regain their freedoms. That is until one terrier steals a map to the sewers and plans an attack to retake the city.

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        Moment. Moment.                                                    

                                                        SFX                                                    

                                                        [UNZIPPING PANTS AND PEEING]                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        Ahhh. Don't worry, I'm not marking anything. It's just piss.                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        It should be more.                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        Hmph. So, what's all this then? You didn't invite me out here just to get drunk, did you?                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        No. [PAUSE] I want to go into the pipes.                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        [PAUSE] No one goes into the pipes.                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        Exactly. They come up to strike and hide when anyone pushes back, safe inside their sewer.                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        Klar. You didn't need four pints to figure that out.                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        If we took the fight to them, it would change.                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        It's too dangerous.                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        You were down there before.                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        That was a long time ago.                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        You know how to fight in those tunnels.                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        We lost over a hundred dogs down there. We weren't ready. No one can be ready. No one knows how to get through those mazes.                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        I've got a map.                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        Was? How?                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        I'm gathering a team. We got to be quick, before the rats figure out what I've got. But I need your help. That's what I brought you out for.                                                    

                                                        Schultz                                                    

                                                        You're serious. This is crazy.                                                    

                                                        Craft                                                    

                                                        Maybe. But what would you give for that puddle to once again be more than just piss?

Into the Pipes

Scene 2

Rocky Mountain Fur Con | 2015

Judah T. Lowe

Beyer

Suilegeal

Peach

Into the Pipes Scene 2

Written by Carrizo

Into the Pipes

Scene 2

Written by Carrizo

Archived at Furrywood.com

Project Premise

Drama

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        You her?                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        Might be. Who's asking?                                                    

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        I'm Beyer. Craft sent me.                                                    

                                                        SFX                                                    

                                                        [OPENS DOOR]                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        Get inside.                                                    

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        Great, I was freezing my tail off out there. [PAUSE] You don't look like a Peach.                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        Thanks. Have you seen the map?                                                    

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        Seen it? I been living with it. Craft's been barking at me to get the whole thing memorized, in case the rats figure out what's what.                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        Have they found out?                                                    

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        I don't know. Only thing I know is those pipes are like a plate of spaghetti. Nothing but U-ies and rotaries down there.                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        Just like Boston, then.                                                    

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        Hey! The T is ordered.                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        So what's the problem? Can't keep it all in your head?                                                    

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        Well, of course, I can. I got most of it already. The problem is it ain't enough. I told Craft, we gonna need guns to get this done.                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        You're right. That's where I come in.                                                    

                                                        SFX                                                    

                                                        [OPENING VAULT DOOR]                                                    

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        Holy Christmas! How'd you stack all this?                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        Found them here and there. You ever fire a gun?                                                    

                                                        Beyer                                                    

                                                        [PAUSE] No.                                                    

                                                        Peach                                                    

                                                        Time to learn.

The Werehuman

Scene 1

Rocky Mountain Fur Con | 2015

Neki

Turnbull

Nevir

Gandy

The Werehuman Scene 1

Written by Tazel Sixpaws

The Werehuman

Scene 1

Written by Tazel Sixpaws

Archived at Furrywood.com

Artwork by Pac

Project Premise

B-Movie Horror

In the Mississippi Town of Padukah, local skunk sheriff Charles Gandy is plagued by mysterious sightings of a pink monster and the inexplicable disappearance of townfolk. A rash of attacks under a new moon indicate something more terrifying and a lot less furry.

Scene Description

In this scene, Charles and Betsie investigate the most recent reports of a 'pink monster' around the home of the wolverine miller Frank Gilberry, when something awful happens.

                                                        Turnbull                                                    

                                                        I'm tellin' ya, Charles, it ain't right! Somethin' unholy's comin' from this here Gilberry Shack! I feel it in my udders!                                                    

                                                        Gandy                                                    

                                                        Now, Betsie, there ain't no need to get all flustered. Our wolverine's just been under the weather as of late.                                                    

                                                        Turnbull                                                    

                                                        Can't you just go in n' arrest him, put him in protective custody or somethin'? For his sake? For ALL our sakes?                                                    

                                                        Gandy                                                    

                                                        You KNOW that ain't right, girl! Frank ain't done anythin' wrong.                                                    

                                                        Turnbull                                                    

                                                        How can a skunk be so yelluh? What happened to 'Servin' and Protect... wait... you hear somethin'?                                                    

                                                        Gandy                                                    

                                                        [BEAT] Jus' the night wind rustlin' the trees, darlin'.                                                    

                                                        Turnbull                                                    

                                                        No, listen! Someone's moanin'... S'close... Charles, let's get outta here. I got a bad feelin'.                                                    

                                                        Gandy                                                    

                                                        Alright, get back into the patrol car an'... Oh my God, what the hell is THAT?                                                    

                                                        Turnbull                                                    

                                                        CHARLES! Get in the car, damn ya! It's comin' this way!                                                    

                                                        Gandy                                                    

                                                        ...Pink'n Hairless... no muzzle...no TAIL...th' ugliest thing I've ever seen! Hey... HEY! STOP RIGHT THERE OR I'LL SHOOT! NO! GET OFF! AAIAIIGHHH! BETSIE! RUN!!                                                    

                                                        Turnbull                                                    

                                                        CHARLES!!!

The Tale of Sir Render

Scene 1

Rocky Mountain Fur Con | 2015

FrozenFoxy

Tencapp

Justin

Render

The Tale of Sir Render Scene 1

Written by Tazel Sixpaws

The Tale of Sir Render

Scene 1

Written by Tazel Sixpaws

Archived at Furrywood.com

Project Premise

Fantasy Comedy

Gather ye around, and let me spin the tale of the Mighty Sir Render, the boar knight who singlehandedly ran away from every battle he ever faced, at whom cowards scoff and birds excrement upon! And tell also the tale of the fair Maiden Tiewahn, the exotic red panda princess whose hand in marriage he so desired, but could only attain if he proved his courage! It is a short story, alas...

Scene Description

Sir Render is approaching the captain of the city guard to apply for the bounty to slay a nearby beast who is ravaging the town livestock, in hopes of winning the confidence of the princess. The captain is not impressed and suggests an easier task for the known coward.

                                                        Render                                                    

                                                        Captain Tencapp! I'm here to apply to slay the livestock menace!                                                    

                                                        Tencapp                                                    

                                                        Oh, Render, that's the best laugh I've had all day! No, seriously, why are you wasting my time?                                                    

                                                        Render                                                    

                                                        I am as serious as an angry chicken, my good badger! I WILL defeat it!                                                    

                                                        Tencapp                                                    

                                                        Render, why would you want something so dangerous, when there are needs more relevant to your `skillset'? Like fighting silkworms?                                                    

                                                        Render                                                    

                                                        Because I am going to win the heart of the princess! And no better way than to slay the beast causing our farms such distress! Even though cows terrify me!                                                    

                                                        Tencapp                                                    

                                                        By Duke Faldar's unwashed beard, I believe you ARE serious! One seriously deluded boar!! Bring back some silkworms and we'll talk, if you don't run away screaming first!                                                    

                                                        Render                                                    

                                                        Sir! This is unjust! The law says ANYONE can apply! I have as much right as you do to try!                                                    

                                                        Tencapp                                                    

                                                        Grr! Fine. Go ahead. Get your fool head crushed under the beast's jaws. See if I care! Anything ELSE?                                                    

                                                        Render                                                    

                                                        Actually, yes. The beggar children have been throwing rocks at me and laughing at me again. I wish to lodge another complaint.                                                    

                                                        Tencapp                                                    

                                                        Well, the tenth one IS a freebie.

Flash Paper

Scene 1

Rocky Mountain Fur Con | 2015

Ansaram

Michaels

Conner

Lloyd

Flash Paper Scene 1

Written by Tazel Sixpaws

Flash Paper

Scene 1

Written by Tazel Sixpaws

Archived at Furrywood.com

Artwork by Pac

Project Premise

Action Drama

Lloyd, turtle sergeant of Fire Station Precinct 66, loses his young fennec partner Danny Michaels during an attempt to rescue a family after a fire. Upon the death of the rookie, Strauss delves into a depression fraught with alcohol and feelings of suicide. It's up to his friends, coworkers, and even the spirit of his dead friend to pull him out of the vicious vortex, and get him back to the front lines to continue the needed work.

                                                        Michaels                                                    

                                                        I'm going back in, Lloyd.                                                    

                                                        Lloyd                                                    

                                                        No, Michaels, you’re not! It's too hot in there. Wait for the vent team!                                                    

                                                        Michaels                                                    

                                                        Screw that! Fennecs can take the heat, and your shell will hold! There's another family in there, for Christ's sake!                                                    

                                                        Lloyd                                                    

                                                        I know, but it’s too dangerous in there! That roof could open up any second!                                                    

                                                        Michaels                                                    

                                                        They're dying in there, and we’re the only ones who can get them! What if it was YOUR family?                                                    

                                                        Lloyd                                                    

                                                        We don’t need any more victims, Danny!                                                    

                                                        Michaels                                                    

                                                        We can’t just stand here!                                                    

                                                        Lloyd                                                    

                                                        [IN RADIO] 5585 to vent team. Vent team, hurry the hell up, we need to get boots and eyes inside, how long till- [OFF RADIO] Michaels! What the hell are you doing? [PAUSE] Oh, Christ.                                                    

                                                        Michaels                                                    

                                                        [FUTZ] Lloyd, I’ve found two kids! I’m pulling them out now. [PAUSE] Heading back!                                                    

                                                        Lloyd                                                    

                                                        [IN RADIO] 5585 to command, emergency traffic only! Emergency traffic only! Michaels, you crazy fox, hurry up! Get out of there now!                                                    

                                                        Radio                                                    

                                                        [FUTZ] Vent team to 5585, we already cut D wall!                                                    

                                                        Lloyd                                                    

                                                        Oh, shit... [IN RADIO] Michaels! Stay where you are! Repeat, stay where you are! Hold to the C wall! They’re venting D! Do NOT come back!                                                    

                                                        Michaels                                                    

                                                        [FUTZ] AAAGGH! Oh, God! Mayday! Mayday! Lloyd!                                                    

                                                        Lloyd                                                    

                                                        Danny! Danny, answer me! Danny!!!

Dialogues

Showing 37-42 of 162 dialogue recordings

Enoch the Eunuch

Into the Pipes

Into the Pipes

The Werehuman

The Tale of Sir Render

Flash Paper